This is the second of my Start of Year posts, slightly delayed by navigating very two starts of year and the obligatory start of year cold (yick!), about my youngest Henry (or H).
H, who is Autistic, has had a rough High School experience. He lasted almost all of year seven at his mainstream school, the same one his sister went to, before they failed to meet his needs. Overall, he’s been to six schools, including two online ones, in four years, with months at home in between, looked after by me. I’m calling it the “Great Autistic School Adventure” and will keep it that way, going forward. There have been some very, very dark moments that are thankfully now in the rearview mirror.
Things started getting back on track when he joined his last school in 2024. The mighty Brookland. In nearby Milnrow, this Specialist Therapeutic SEND school specialises in getting children who have dropped out of regular schooling back into it. With H they have they succeeded big time!
When H joined the school, unknown to us, they had just changed Heads. The new Head wasn’t up to the job, and dropped the ball and didn’t organise H’s GCSEs. So he did his GCSE’s in five to six months last year after the ferociously capable new Head (shout out to Mrs Matthews) sorted it all out at the last minute. He finally got four 7s (Maths and the three sciences) and two 6s (English and History), which is a massive achievement given his very unsettled educational career.
This time last year, we visited Hulme Grammar for a sixth form visit morning, as part of our “leave no stone unturned” tour of Oldam sixth forms in September to November. It quickly became clear that this was a great match for him and his needs. From the moment we walked into reception, it was clear the staff are really, really nice, on the ball, and clever enough to keep up with my little Evil Genius. There was an instant, generous acceptance of H, and that has continued now that he’s joined the school. I’m also supremely impressed that this extends to us as slightly frazzled, but not defeated, parents of an ASD young person. It’s like my brain is swimming in pure, bright, invigorating, liquid intelligence every time I go there. Rachel is extremely happy as well, since she’s an Old Girl of the School.
A couple of weeks after the school visit, we started a smooth transition process. They took advantage of the fact that H was studying GCSE Chemistry independently at home. So every Tuesday late afternoon after a full day at Brookland, he would do the required practicals with Dr Millington, Hulme’s outreach officer and all round Ace Platinum Star Teacher, who is now his form tutor. Dr Millington also went through the entire course, setting homework, and even did past exam papers, with the added benefit that he is an examiner. We got a ton of added value there! This was important because he is super bright, and I’m not just saying this as a doting parent. He gives both me and Rachel, who are educated to postgraduate level, a run for our money on any subject once he gets going. He literally sucks in information, analyses and has almost perfect recall. The nearest analogy I can think of as a sci fi fan is the Mentats in the Dune novels. It’s one of the needs that need fulfilling on his Educational Healthcare Plan (or EHCP, a legally binding document that schools have to follow or they “fail to meet need” ). I found out that in those lab sessions, he now has the resilience to manage his condition and the high pressure of a school that expects 100% effort and achievement from day one. Also, the bus ride home after a quick walk up a steep northern hill!
Now that he has started and settled into the school, he has completed the first half term without incident. I’m glad to say H is rising to the challenge of Sixth Form at Hulme and blossoming there. He is managing not only his homework and ongoing revision, but also making time for Duke of Edinburgh and other co-curricular activities, such as coding club. He’s even applied to be a Prefect, giving up one of his free periods to help pupils in the lower school. When he is at home also finds time to keep to his fitness regime that Mr Gray at Brookland taught him. He got a set of weights for his recent birthday back in September. I find this overwhelming, in a good way, given where he was even last year, when he had only just started doing GCSEs. The best I could envision before we went to Hulme was a place at the very, very busy (but lovely) Oldham Sixth Form College, which would have been challenging, to say the least. Going back further, pre-Brookland, I was looking at the sad situation where H had no academic future, which he has aspired to since he was eight, and would probably have been living at home. Now, inspired by his progress at Hulme, the resilience he learnt at Brookland, and the fact that his sister has just started at Durham, he’s talking to us about going to University, which the school is actively supporting, and the idea that he will go away and live independently.
As I told Dr Millington the last time I saw him, “I’m living in some sort of crazy dream”. I’ve posted this because, primarily, I’m so proud of him for getting to Hulme. But also to show other parents of Autistic Children, who are often gaslighted, belittled and treated unfairly by the very people in the ASD System who are meant to be helping them (teachers, healthcare professionals, LEA SEND officers) to get an education that they are legally entitled to, that with a persistent tough love approach you can get the education your child needs, so they can have the future that they deserve.
